24 Hours Down

24 hours and have not pulled. That eyelash still wants to be pulled so badly and from playing with over the week it it is now a little crooked which only makes not pulling it that much harder. Trying to stay strong. Now onto the next 24 hours although the weekends are a bit easier for me not to pull than the weekdays.

Day 1.

The hair is still there. I want to pull it so bad. Instead, I pulled 3 stubby eyebrow hairs and I'm so frustrated with myself. Yesterday i was working from home and someone knocked on my door before I had put my make up on (aka painted in my eyebrows) and I freaked out. That feeling is awful and I remember the short time when I didnt have to worry about my make up and how freeing it was. Time to get back to that place. Right now is the first minute of Day 1. I just need to make it to Day 2.

Battle with that one hair

You know that one hair, the one that is kind of keeping a spot from being completely bald, that you just cant stop touching? Ugh. I have one of those right now- it's been 4 days since i noticed it and have not pulled it but i want to so, so bad. The rest of my eyelashes are looking fantastic but that one spot that I pulled from earlier in the month is not filled in yet and if I pull this one hair it will leave the spot looking a lot sparser. At least now I can use mascara and eyeliner enough to lump them all together so the spot doesnt look so bare. It is begging me to pull it but I can't give in!

Have you ever just rubbed a hair back and forth in your fingers hoping that it just comes out on its own so you dont feel the guilt? I did that last night. i didnt pull but it's almost like you want that hair to loosen up or something and just 'naturally' fall out. I am able to rationalize and make so many excuses with my trich.

My eyebrows are still suffering but my eyelashes are good. With my eyebrows it's those stubby little hairs that I can't resist. So sick of this disease. NEED TO STOP PULLING COMPLETELY. Enough already!

Summer hair

Summer is a hard time to be without hair. That should be incentive enough for me to stop pulling but it just doesnt seem to have done the trick. What the hell is going on? I'm trying so hard to figure out patterns of when I pull the most but I cant seem to notice anything other than I just like to pull. It's relaxing. Pulling a hair can be so satisfying. And then you feel like shit.

On a positive note last week my hair stylist stated that hair tends to grow much faster in warmer weather. Hello small silver lining. So at least if i pull it out now it will grow back a bit faster. ha. I need to stop. I WANT to stop. Do i just not want it bad enough? I've really had enough. Dont you wish there was just a magic pill that could help us? Sure, we have a pill to help old men get erections but we cant come up with a pill to help all of us that feel self conscious every day because we pull our hair. Maybe we need to speak up more, make the drug companies see what a market their is, how much money they could make. Until then, we need to figure out a way to stop the damn pulling. Grrr....