I just found out that my upcoming trial, my first solo jury trial, may be filmed by HBO since they are doing a documentary on the sex crimes bureau at the Manhattan DA's office and my clients case is somehow getting noticed. Awesome. The case is a loser, there is no getting around that, so there is not a ton of pressure either way- there is DNA and an identification so really I can only do so much and wont be losing any sleep if the guy is convicted. But, the idea of being filmed is terrifying. Putting aside for a moment the fact that I'm already super stressed about other things, I'm trying to win my battle with trich, am nervous about doing a jury trial on my own and the work involved over the next month, but to be put on camera? Ugh. One bad angle and the secret is exposed. I could really do without that added pressure. I'll find out next Tuesday for sure but as of this morning it looks like I dont have much of a choice.
On a positive note, I've hit day 10 which is a pretty big milestone for me but it has been REALLY hard and with all the other shit that is hitting the fan (my dads doctor basically blackmailing him before he'll do another surgery (have i mentioned my dad is a 9/11 burn victim? so its a whole new level of fucked up)) , the 10th anniversary of my childhood friends death is this Friday, and I'm having doubts about my fabulous boyfriend (long story) - this week is definitely going to be a BIG test for me and I'm just trying to take it one day at a time and make it through. Yuck.
Anyway, thanks for reading and apologies for the random venting. Just a sucky week.
Reason #10- being filmed where I cant control the views and close ups that are taken.
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Sucky week for me too. I'll give you the advice that I'm trying to take myself- turn the bad stuff into motivation to work harder. Camera's? Don't be afraid. Be determined to be camera ready. In the meantime, I guess we just have to try to survive til the end of the week.
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