Have you always had eyelashes?

When I was in Florida a few weeks ago I had a chance to see a friend of mine that I hadn't seen in years. He and I are very close but life had taken us in different (physical) directions so getting together had been tough since we graduated from college. He has been living in Florida for a while and we finally made plans to hang out the night I was in West Palm Beach.

Just to give a little background, he and I became friends in college and he had a reputation for being a bit of a flirt- in fact, I think he hooked up with quite a few girls in my sorority (yes, i was in a sorority- not my proudest moments). Anyway, at some point we began an on-again off-again relationship where we were basically friends with benefits. We would go through periods where we would just be friends and then we'd both be bored and hook up again- at one point I was even dating his roommate (dont ask). Junior year we hung out, with another two friends, literally every night and would smoke, drink, watch movies, listen to music and just do typical college stuff.

Needless to say we had an unusual relationship but I can truly say that he is, and probably always will be, one of my favorite friends. We can pick up just where we left off, we motivate each other to want to be better and we talk about almost everything. No matter where life takes us, he will have a special place in my heart.

I give you the background primarily so that you can understand how much time we spent together. When we were in Florida a few weeks ago, after a number of drinks, he turned to me and said "Kimmie, I need to ask you something. I feel like I'm going crazy but I have to ask" (1. very few people are allowed to call me kimmie, and 2.obviously this got my attention). He then followed with "have you always had eyelashes?"

I was caught a little off guard but was so happy he noticed and that he asked. He said he felt horrible and uncomfortable asking me but I assured him it was okay, that I felt good talking about it. He said that he had noticed when they were missing, particularly considering our "relationship" and the time we spent together, but he never thought much about it. In fact, he said he equated it to him having flat feet- some people just have different features and I just happened to not have eyelashes (remember, this is after quite a lot of drinking).

Next he told me that when he was younger he used to pull his eyebrows. It didn't continue into adulthood but once again, I was left feeling surprised at how many people have a form of trich or something similar. Not only did this make me motivated to keep up the progress I've made with trich but it made me a little sad for all the years I spent feeling like a freak, like someone that people looked at and judged me based on the fact I didnt have eyelashes. There will always be some jerk who does treat you like a freak, but if I've learned anything the last few months, it's really that people are much more understanding and less judgmental then we give them credit for. Once we stop judging and stop assuming how people will react, we can feel better about ourselves and have healthier relationships. Now I just wish I'd told him years ago.